The liberation
The devil walked around me, woke me by horrific dreams at three a.m.which stopped after the confession.Since then my recovery´d taken more than seven months.Finally I managed to get rid of him ( April 2004 ).I´d started to take an interest in the occult since I was twelve years old.In this country there was a boom of eastern religions and I always held my breath when I heard the word Tibet.I devoted myself to reading František Bardon´s works and especially one of them „The Key to the real Kabala“ captivated me.It should have been the doctrine of the initiated ones who helped the suffering mankind by emitting God´s sparkles from the material into the higher worlds.
Then I went through the period of relative peace.God guarded me like a treasure, he didn´t allow anything to occur to me.When I was small I served as an alterboy and didn´t consider this Cabala to be the departure from God.It was the thin edge of the wedge.During my senior years of conservatoire I began reading Dalailama´s books and in 2000 I yielded to the vision that I´d been predestined to lead people to the truth by means of Buddhism.The situation escalated when I started being interested in the Movement of Diamont way of Tibet Buddhism.I meditated almost all the time.I began being aggresive to my parents because I thought only the way of Buddhism was the right one.I started having difficulties in communicating things to other people, and was scared stiff.I was beside myself with fear.
I took part in a few events that were organized by lamas and started to be serious about entering the Tibet monastery.
Then a friend of mine told me about the path of Buddhism which is called dzogchen.I deliberately started to train this devil´s way ---I sacrificed my body to the demons--.In order to get over the fear of them I obtained a large drum and I practised various meditation techniques.I completely withdrew from the normal life.Once in a week my elder colleagues and I got together in Bratislava.The demons were divided into the Scorpions and Snakes as well as the demons in Christianity – which I didn´t know.We imagined to become the gruesome gods and told each other it was the potential of our mind.I always thought it was a good thing.When my mother went to church I joined her so that she shouldn´t nag at me but especially during Holy Communion my head was full of voices that literally said they´d slaughter all the Christians and how great it´d have been to kill this child.Personally, I was frightened of these voices because I heard them whenever some child or young person went past me.
I was unable to understand where they´d come from since I was trying hard to express love and sympathy to the other human beings.Then I read in a book that they were the remainders of our former evil deeds which turned up.When I meditated or worked with my mind they left me alone.Only when I was among people they adviced me how and who I should hurt.I tried to get rid of them but it didn´t work.
Then my mother and I were on the pilgrimage in Rome where I considered myself to be Buddhist.However, something strange happened ------- I was fascinated by Rome.I began reading the Bible and taking Jesus for God.Nevertheless, my parents invited a healer to our place ( he meant to buy one part of our neighbour´s garden ) and I told him that Buddhism is functionless and the Bible is very good.He sized me up ( he was a gypsy ) and replied that I hadn´t had the slightest idea what it was about.I started to reason but at the end of our dialogue he succeeded in convincing me that Buddhism is much better than Christianity.And so I relapsed into dzogchen.I started to recite mantras and to imagine various macabre gods that had eaten me.
Then in September 2004 I ran so high temperature that it couldn´t be reduced by anything.I had more than 40 grades Celsious.Suddenly I heard a voice within me --- so now you´re going to us because you´ve got a place here ---- and I saw the devil.I began to ask Jesus Christ to protect me.Perhaps, from fever or from delirium all of a sudden I saw an angel before me.This angel was very light and the beam of light went from his mouth.He´s defeated Satan.When he drove him away for a while he told me:“I´m Michael one of seven angels who are standing before the Lord and you either convert or die!“At that moment I saw myself.I saw everything.I saw my believing in the devil and how he has power over me.I wanted to go away from him and so I told the angel that I wanted to be God´s property again.I started to cry and express my regret and firm decision that I didn´t want the devil anymore and I wanted to be with God and to Love Him as before.Out of the blue the devil appeared and said he had right over me but this powerful angel opened his mouth again and drove him away with a withering beam this time.
The devil walked around me, woke me by horrific dreams at three a.m.which stopped after the confession. Since then my recovery´d taken more than seven months.Finally I managed to get rid of him.
I threw away all the occult books but I wouldn´t have got rid of him if it weren´t for the Archangel Michel, ten beads of the rosary each day and medallion of the Saint Benedict – the prayer to the Saint Benedict – I realized God had always protected me and never allowed something worse happen to me.I even defended the dessertation at the Faculty of Music, Drama and fine Arts and at home things were all right.I love God for what he´d done to me.
I wouldn´t manage it without God and I can´t imagine how I could blaspheme with such an impunity.However, God always knew in his omnipotence how it´d end up and took me for a minor.Nevertheless, it´s terrible when so many beautiful and fantastic people ( human souls ) are seduced by the pipe dreams of supernatural powers since they don´t know it´s a freeway to hell.I´d like to point out that the day of my cure coincides with the day when a Holy Mass was served for me in Lourdes.It must be more than just a coincidence.
As for my experience with the demons I´ve seen with my own eyes how some lamas are possessed with them and then they knew lots of things, in particular what is happening where and who is coming to us ( the demons only know what´s happening or what has happened or what can be noticed from the human behaviour.They don´t read your thoughts but they can see it on you because Satan is also a pure spirit – Evagrius Pontský ).I´ve seen how lamas´ faces were shining and they were so glued to their seats that it was impossible for you to move them ( see Gabriel Amorth´s works ).I wanted to conclude with the Saint John´s words: “Children, keep away from both spiritual and physical idols!“
Stanislav Macák, Bratislava, February 2006
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